Thursday, August 25, 2011

You say it's your birthday....

Happy Birthday boys. I can not believe that you are 3.years.old Time goes so quickly - sometimes I look at you and I still can't believe that you are here. Other times, like when you're fighting over a toy, or WWF wrestling in the living room, the noise in our house makes it very clear that you are here.

I will never forgot what it was like to have a silent home.

And, I'll take the noise any day.

Happy Birthday. I love you both very much!


Tuesday, August 23, 2011

4th Blogoversary

Tomorrow is my 4 year Blogoversary. Four years since I started writing as a way to sort out my feelings of despair as J and I struggled with infertility and how we would ever build a family.
I now struggle sometimes with continuing to blog - although I do love to write and always have found that I feel I can express myself best in writing. There are so many issues with maintaining a blog - time to write and whether or not anyone is interested in what I'm writing are the two main ones for me.
It is so often difficult to write, trying to raise two small children alone and maintain a household as well. So many times, I think to myself, "OMG, I'd love to tell the world about this." But by the time, we finish whatever it is that we're doing, and the boys get to bed, and I actually have some time to sit down and write, I'm often too exhausted to sign on to the computer and put our story down on virtual paper. I should try harder because 1. I hope that someday my children will be able to see this blog as a virtual memory book and 2. I don't want to use the excuse of having to raise two children alone as an excuse for not doing something. There are probably millions of people doing the same things every day - and I try to live by the idea that if something is important to you you will find time for it.
I guess the bigger issue for me now is whether anyone is interested in what I have to say. I guess I don't always feel like we have the most exciting life - I see it more as pretty average. With the one small difference being my children are twins. So most posts are about them and where they are at developmentally, pictures, etc. Nothing extraordinarily exciting. Except to me and the people who know and love them.
Before my blog turned into a parenting multiples blog the writing came so easily for me - I could spew off post after post about my subject matter - infertility - and I had such clear opinions on the subject. I also felt really confident in my knowledge of the subject matter - I felt like I was an expert on infertility - having been in the trenches for nearly 7 years. Now, with the parenting multiples blog, well, I'm not a parenting expert. I'm not an expert at raising kids. Hell, most days I feel like I don't know what the hell I'm doing and my kids will be lucky if we can get through to adulthood without major mistakes on my part. I yell sometimes when I probably shouldn't, I let them watch maybe too much t.v, and eat junk food snacks instead of apples, I just don't know how much I'm doing right or wrong.
So, that makes it even more difficult to write - like what the heck does this chick know about raising multiples?

But I do know that I am learning more and more about parenting multiples each day and maybe someday I will be an expert. Maybe I'll publish a book about raising twins and all the joy and chaos that goes along with that. Even if I'm not a one-day expert though, at least my children will be able to look back on this blog and have some evidence of the mistakes I made to use against me - and some evidence of my love for them as well.

Thursday, August 18, 2011


I've been DVR'ing and watching Dr. Phil at night after the boys go to bed. It's my me-time (sometimes a drink, almost always potato chips, and Dr. Phil or a book - on the kindle)

Last night Dr. Phil said something that resonated with me -- "There are a few absolute drop dead dealbreakers in a marriage."

What J did was, according to Dr. Phil, a dealbreaker - so why can I not be more angry? Should I be? Every day I wonder if I'm handling the situation the way I should be. Everyone I talk to about it is biased - they are my family and friends. So, I've decided to seek out the opinion and help of a professional counselor. I need to make sure I handle this situation in the best possible manner for the boys and their future.

Savings 8-14-11

Grocery shopping trip this week included shopping at Rite Aid, Top's and Walmart - plus ordering pull ups from Amazon

Amazon - $21.11 for 96 count pampers pull ups - 21cents each

Total merchandise - $277.00
Total OOP - $202.00
Savings of $75.00 or about 27%

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Staycation July 2011

We had a staycation this past week. Tons of fun! We did so much and it completely stunk going back to work. And try explaining to two 3 year olds why today is a work day and not another vacation day. Not fun.

To start off the week we spent the weekend at Grandpa's house visiting. We went to the beach - but once again the boys were not willing to go in the water, or even near the water for that matter. So, needless to say we didn't stay long in the 95 degree weather. I don't understand my children and their obsession with keeping their socks and shoes on. Must come from J. I prefer to go around barefoot as much as possible.

On Monday we visited Grandpa with the beard and then drove home, with Aunt Stef, to our house. This was the first visit with Grandpa with the beard that Alex did not cry at (those beards are a scary thing you know). He even was willing to ride next to Grandpa in the golf cart.

Tuesday the boys did go to daycare so that Mommy could car shop - the car is in desperate need of being retired. And we were able to find one so we should have it soon.

Then for the rest of the week we did different fun things.

We went to the fair, and saw all the animals, attempted rides but were too scared, and won a nemo fish by playing a ball toss game. Sadly though, Nemo wanted to go back to the ocean to visit his own Mom and dad so we sent him there by way of toilet flush the next day. We went to the play museum and saw Big Bird's nest, rode on a train, and shopped at the pretend grocery store. We went to the playground and the beach and actually went into the water (although we did keep our socks on) and had fun building a sand castle. If I tell my children I need their superpowers to help build the castle they are much more willing to go close to the water.

There was one incident where we got a little too tired and had a major meltdown. But luckily no one actually called the police on Mommy - they just thought I was abducting Alex from Walmart as he screamed at the top of his lungs, "No, No, Go back, No, I won't get in the car! I NEED a Toy!!" Good thing he threw in the last part about the toy or I seriously might have been sitting in a jail cell while Aunt Stef went to get the boys birth certificates for my proof of parenthood.

They say marriage is for better or for worse. So is parenthood I guess.

All in all it was a great staycation.