Free eBook - Deal of the Day

I try to post my favorite deal that I've found each day. Today is a free ebook from Amazon. The Everything Grow Your Own Vegetables book.

Download a free copy of The Everything Grow Your Own Vegetables Book from Amazon.com.


Please note that the price is currently $0.00, but that could change at any time. Be sure to check the price before checking out to verify that it is still free.
This ebook is specifically for Kindles, but you can download a free application that enables you to read Kindle ebooks on your PC.

Thanks Money Saving Mom!

Calgon and other bath remedies

Well J came up for a short visit on Monday afternoon. Monday evening he took my credit card to pick up the pizza and proceeded to use it to buy legal substances at a gas station that are undetectable in a drug test. I didn't know at the time because, of course he hid the receipt.
On Tuesday, he called me at work and told me some story about how his old friends had called and he had to go make a statement at the police station about some items he had sold them last year - apparently the husband and wife were fighting over it. When I questioned him about why his old friend knew he was at my house since they hadn't called or stopped by since he left he had no answer. So, I immediately knew he was lying.
When I got home I found he had taken about $50.00 of merchandise out of my house (items consisting of tampons, shampoo, laundry soap, etc) that he was, I believe, planning on returning to the store and attempting to get drug money that way. He also left a note that said he was sorry and just doesn't know how to change.
He called late last night asking to stay at my house over night as he had no where to go. I told him no.

This morning as I was driving to work he flagged me down. I stopped and he asked for a ride. I gave him a ride and all the while he was asking to stay at the house just one more day, just to see the kids one more time, just for a few hours to take a nap, yadda, yadda, yadda. I repeatedly told him no and that he has stolen from me one too many times. He was wigging out and appeared to be higher than a kite. He had slurred speech, couldn't talk normally, disoriented thinking, couldn't get words out of his mouth, crying, agitation, anger. He claims he just can't sleep and felt like he was having a stroke. I offered to bring him to the hospital but he refused. He called the local crisis center but they don't have any beds available. They told him to call back every morning until they do.
When he finally realized I wasn't going to give in and let him come to the house, he got out of my car and left. he mumbled something about "Thanks - I thought I could count on you. Doesn't matter if I live or die. I never wanted it to be like this." Then I drove away.

I feel awful. I hope that he wasn't actually having a stroke, or other medical emergency. I feel guilty but I know that if I keep helping him his issues will never be resolved. And how many times do I allow him to steal from me?
I'm afraid too, that he will show up at the house when the kids are at home. How can I explain to them why Daddy is knocking on the door and I am calling the police and not letting him in??

I hate that his addiction has done this to our family.

I LOVE Free!

Today I already found two great deals!

The first is a B1G1 sub at Quizno's good through the month of April. That will make for a cheap lunch! Find it at their facebook page.

The second was a free hydro-massage (valid at participating locations) good during the week of April 16-20. Check out Money Saving Mom to find the link. That is going to be awesome! Even if it's only 15 or 20 minutes of complete relaxation - which I've not had for, oh I don't know, about 3 1/2 years now. I hope the location near is participating.

Have you found any great deals lately?

Pack it up

Getting ready to head out to Grandpa's for the Easter holiday this weekend means doing all the laundry, packing and getting weekend chores like trash and recyclables done before leaving. I thought it would be a good idea to have the boys help me pack their clothes last night. Didn't.go.as.planned. Landon was helpful and willing to do everything I asked but for whatever reason Alex had a meltdown because the jammies he wanted were not in his drawer. Even though I tried to reason with him that i would have time for laundry tomorrow and his jammies would be clean then he was screaming and crying for near 15 minutes. Complete tantrum. So, instead of calmly packing Landon and I got to listen to hysteria and of course that makes my blood pressure go up.
Plan for today. In between working get laundry done and pack suitcase while boys are at daycare. Pick up boys after work and go to playground. Don't involve testy 3 year olds with packing process late in evening. Live and learn.

On another note: J wants to come to visit for a week again. He is still trying to find a facility that will take him and is still working on getting a referral to said facility. Not sure if it's a good idea - I hate these decisions. I know he wants time to spend with the boys but it is nervewracking for me because I feel I constantly have to be on guard and watching what he's doing. trying to steal from me. And it's exhausting to put on the happy face so the kids don't have to know, see, feel that daddy has issues. I know that one day they will begin to realize, but for now, they only know that Daddy stays at their aunt's house so he can "fix" some things. And  that's all they need to know right now.

April Meal Plan

1- baked potato soup, grilled sandwiches

2- spaghetti & meatballs

3- fish sticks, noodles or rice

4- crescent dogs, fries

5- tuna casserole

6- visiting family

7- visiting family

8- Happy Easter! Visiting family

9- spaghetti & meatballs

10- pancakes and sausage

11- sausage stroganoff, salad

12- takeout

13- chicken parm casserole

14- pizza

15- leftovers

16- spaghetti & meatballs

17- baked potato soup, grilled sandwiches

18- ham and noodle skillet

19- tacos in a sleeping bag

20- salisbury steak

21- frittata

22- kid's choice

23- spaghetti & meatballs

24- leftovers

25- pizza

26- takeout

27- french toast, smoothies

28- taco pasta

29- leftovers

30- spaghetti & meatballs

Memory Making

The past few weeks I have been home with the boys as our daycare provider just recently gave birth to her first child. So, since she was on vacation, I was too as I don't have backup childcare.Now, as I sit here quietly working, during our first day back to "work" and daycare, I can reflect on the past two weeks and all of the fun, emotions, and chaos.
I have to say I have huge respect for stay at home moms. Many times over these two weeks I found my patience wearing thin and I wondered how our daycare provider manages to get through the day with my often stubborn, independent children. These boys kept me on my toes the entire time. There were no naps, although many times, I could have just collapsed on the sofa and slept for hours. The upside of no naps is an earlier bedtime and more Mommy time (which includes an extra glass of wine), so I guess naptime has its pros and cons.
As I watched the boys run throughout the house, making a mess in every corner, run through the playground, climb the climbing walls, sliding down the slides, and run through our backyard as we played monster, I felt profound joy in all that I am blessed enough to experience. I will never forget a time a few years back when a neighbor stopped by my house one evening as she was selling raffle tickets for a community event. I was home alone, reading, and she came in so I could get cash to buy a ticket. She commented on how quiet my house was and how she would give anything for a bit of quiet in her's (she has four children). I smiled, and laughed, then closed the door when she left and cried. I had just had a failed cycle and she had no idea how I would have loved to trade places with her for one second and be that Mom in that noisy house. Now I am that Mom and even though I am often driven to the point of wanting to pull my hair out I know I would never trade my noisy for quiet again.
I also felt profound sadness over the past few weeks for J and all that he is missing. I wish, wish, wish it could be different and I hope and pray that something will knock him in the head and he will start to make some serious changes. The boys are still young enough to not really have a memory of any of this - but that time is fleeting.

Fleeting time....

Someday, probably in the not too far off future, even when we are on vacation together, there will be friends to play with, girlfriends, school, sports, taking up their time. But for now we can enjoy each other and all of the happiness that comes from making memories together.
So, I will sit here today, back at work, and file away my memories of our chaotic two week vacation, and smile.

Happy 100th Birthday!

Today the Girl Scouts are celebrating their 100th anniversary. Juliette Gordon Low started the first girl Scout troop with 18 girls in 1912 and since then girl Scouting has been offering girls opportunities to make friends, learn life skills, and so much more! When it began Girl Scouting was able to teach girls how to cook and sew. Today girls can learn engineering, web design, and computer technology. Troops communicate using facebook, twitter, and blogging. We've come a long way!
My memories of Girl Scouting as a child are the fabulous trips our troop went on, the fun outings to the local parks for picnics, camping overnight in screen houses, and how involved my Mom (who was our troop leader) was able to me involved with us. I was however not fond of camping. My memories of summer camp are of having my first period there. Not.good.

Over 3 million girls and women are part of Girl Scouting today. Many, many more are alumnae of this group. Whatever your memories of Girl Scouts, take a moment today to reflect on those 18 girls meeting with Juliette Gordon Low, and what they began 100 years ago!

Happy Birthday Girl Scouts!

March Meal Plan

1- frittata, sausage, fruit

2 - spaghetti and meatballs

3- chicken thigh stew

4- Giada's mac n cheese muffin cups

5- takeout

6- cheesy chicken rotini

7- fish sticks, noodles

8- reuben mac n cheese, salad

9- leftovers

10- knocks and beans supreme, salad

11 - loaded baked potato soup, grilled sandwiches

12- spaghetti and meatballs

13- pizza

14- Italian Style Tater Tot Casserole, salad

15- meatloaf, mashed potatoes

16- hot dogs and french fries, salad

17- tortellini vegetable soup, crusty bread

18- spaghetti and meatballs

19- fish sticks, noodles

20- leftovers

21- macaroni and cheese

22- spaghetti and meatballs

23- Ranch chicken parmesean (OAMC)

24-sausage stroganoff, salad

25- takeout

26- brown sugar chicken, rice (aka: candy chicken)

27- french toast, sausage, fruit

28- pizza

29-  creamy beef over noodles

30- tuna casserole

31- fish tacos, rice and beans

Truth

Taking Stock in Kleenex

February, while not quite over yet, has flown by and will turn to March in just a few short days. I haven't had much time to post as life as been chaotic in our home the past few weeks. Here's the short, bulleted, update:

* Took J to the crisis center and dropped him off. He will not be coming back here to our home until he is well on his way down the road to recovery. Although he thinks otherwise. My therapists tells me however that I am calling the shots now (sometimes difficult to act that way)
* The kids came down with a nasty cold which I would come to find out two weeks later was RSV. Alex visited urgent care, Landon the ER, then an overnight hospital stay due to breathing difficulties from congestion, I had the cold too, but dragged myself around to Dr. appointments, in an effort to get my children well. Alex is almost back to normal. Landon is beginning to eat again after a week of no food, none, nothing at all. He is still really tired and doesn't run around much, but hopefully in another week or so he will be back to normal too. I finally was able to visit my Dr. and have a sinus infection and am also exhausted. Pediatrician says it could take us all 6-8 weeks to feel completely back to normal. So we are taking it one day at a time.
* I am thankful that it was just a cold and nothing more serious.
* During this time J continued to call me and make up lies about how the crisis center was kicking him out and he had no where to go, and beg me to pick him up and let him come home. Or he would get himself admitted to the hospital for high blood sugar in hopes of actually getting kicked out. It didn;t work - I didn't falter, and I did not pick him up. And, can we say, selfish, selfish man?
* Kids went back to daycare yesterday after almost two weeks out (off and on) and I am finally catching up on work, household chores, etc. Though I am taking this afternoon to lay on the sofa and catch up on Dr. Phil before picking them up at 5pm. I am in serious need to some rest and ME time.
* J moved from the crisis center to an inpatient rehab this morning. he called me last night to tell me. I don;t know how long they will keep him - he really needs at least 90 days. He is convinced that he is only staying 30 days and is coming home to live after that. I told him no way and he hung up on me. he is too concerned about when he's getting out to focus attention on doing the work necessary to get a real chance at successfully getting better. I don;t know if he'll even make it to complete the 30 days with that attitude.

Hopefully March is better.

Inspirational Messages

February Menu Plan

1- Italian Style Tater Tot Casserole, salad

2 - crockpot black bean and salsa chicken, rice

3 - Tortellini vegetable soup, sandwiches

4 - Italian sausage stew, noodles

5 - Toasted Monkey sandwiches, smoothies

6- Spaghetti & Meatballs

7- Fish, noodles, vegetables

8- Loaded Baked Potato Soup, Sandwiches

9- Pizza and salad

10- takeout

11- peanut butter and apple crescents, smoothies

13- Spaghetti & Meatballs

14- Oven baked chicken legs, rice a roni

15- leftovers

16- pierogies, vegetable

17- Pasta with chicken thighs (or legs)

18- sausage stroganoff, salad

19- kid's choice (mac n cheese, hot dogs, fish sticks, etc - whatever they decide)

20- Spaghetti & Meatballs

21- Fish, noodles, vegetables

22- Loaded Baked Potato Soup, Sandwiches

23- Pizza (mexican)

24- takeout

25- frittata, potatoes, sausage

26- chicken nugget tacos, rice

27- Spaghetti & Meatballs

28- chicken osso bucco

29- leftovers


Snacks -
Slammin Graham Cracker PB&J Nachos

I know what I was feeling...

but what was I thinking? That's how the song goes, right? So true.

J did it again. Duped me. Took advantage of my kindness. You can not even give that man an inch or he will take a mile.
In the few shorts weeks I have allowed him into our home for a visit while he waits on a location for more treatment, I have been lied to, had my material possessions nearly sold, and basically bs'd the entire time.
No more. No more visits, no more kindness. I will NOT allow him to use his medical issues as a means to make me feel sympathy for him anymore.

These are the top three things I want from my husband (or any man I may be in a relationship with) - honesty, integrity,  and respect. Right now J can't give any of those things to me. And they are things I am entitled to in a relationship.
In six short months our separation agreement will be a year old. Time enough to have it changed to a divorce decree.
I don't think he realizes that the sand is quickly running through the hourglass.

Shopping for FREE or cheap

My plan for this week

Walmart -
BIC 10pk pens $1.00
- (1) $1.00/1 coupon (SS 1/8/12)
FREE


Tops -
Nabisco to-go packs $1.00
Buy 6
- (2) $3.00/3 coupon (SS 1/8/12)
FREE

International delight creamer $1.66
- (1) $0.55/1 coupon (SS 1/8/12)
Final - $0.56

Total OOP - $0.56
Savings of $8.10 or 94%

Shopping for Free or Cheap

My plan for this week is being altered a lot as I had planned on heading to both CVS and Walgreens for some great deals and stockup prices - but we're getting our first snowstorm of the season and neither of these stores is nearby so I've got to change the plan.

Rite Aid
Transaction #1 -
Clean and Clear B1G1 50%
Buy 2 - +/- $8.99
- (2) $2.00/1 (ss 1/8/12)
- (1) $1.00/1 video value
final - $3.99

Bengay $5.99
- $2.00/1 in-ad coupon
- (1) $3.00/1 printable coupon
final - $0.99

Stayfree pads 2 for $5.00
Buy 4 - $10.00
- $1.00 in-ad coupon
- (2) $1.00/2 stayfree coupon
final - $7.00

Neosporin $5.02 +/-
- $2.00/1 (ss 1/8/12)
final - $3.02

total order $15.00
use $4.00 UPR's from last week
Final OOP - $11.00
Get $10.00 UPR

2nd transaction -
One a day vitamins 2 for $18.00
- $1.00/1 video values
- (2) $2.00/1 (ss 1/1/12)
final - $13.00
use $10.00 UPR from transaction #1
final OOP $3.00
Get $5.00 UPR

3rd transaction -
Thermacare $3.00

2 boxes kleenex $2.58
- $1.00/2 video value
final - $1.58

palmolive dish soap $2.58
- $1.00/2 (ss 1/1/12)
final - $1.58

total order $6.16
use $5.00 UPR from transaction #2
final OOP - $1.16
Get$3.00 UPR

Finals at Rite Aid - $56.16 worth of product
Total OOP $15.16 with $3.00 UPR for next week
saved $41.00 or 73%

Raindrops

Funny thing that this was my favorite song when I was about 3 years old. Maybe some cosmic message to my future self to remember to always keep a positive outlook on life and be grateful for what is good.

Shopping for Free or Cheap

This is my shopping plan for this week - 1/1/12-1/7/12:

CVS

Nivea Lip Care - $2.50
Deal Idea:
Buy 4 Nivea Lip Care $2.50 each
-(2)$3/2 Nivea Lip Product Coupon from the 1/1 RedPlum insert
Pay: $4
Get a $5 ECB
Free + $1 Money Maker after coupons & ECB

TOTAL OOP $4.00

WALGREENS
Triaminic 2/$10.00
Get $5.00 RR wyb 2

Buy 2 $10.00
-(2) $3/1 Triaminic Fever Reducer, exp 2/15/12 (SS 12/4/11)
Pay $4
Get a $5 RR
Free + $1 Money Maker after coupons and RR

2nd transaction-
Advil Congestion $5
Dimetapp $5
-(1) $2/1 advil congestion relief, exp 3/4/12 (RP 12/11/11)
-(1) $1/1 dimetapp product printable coupon
-$5 RR from previous transaction
Pay $2
Get a $5 RR
Free + $3.00 Money Maker after coupons and RR

TOTAL OOP $6.00

RITE AID
Carefree pantyliners $1.00
Buy 2
Pay $2
Get $1 UPR

Playtex tampons $3.99
-(1) $1/1 playtex gentle glide tampons (SavingsStar)
-(1) $1/1 playtex gentle glide tampons (SS 11/20/11)
Pay $1.99
Get $1.00 UPR

Centrum ProNutrients BOGO 50% off
Buy 2 at +/- $12.50each
Total $19.75 after BOGO
-(2) $5/1 centrum pronutrients (RP 1/1/12)
-(1) $4/1 centrum pronutrients RA printable
Pay $5.75
Get $2.00 UPR (* $19.75 counted toward resolution rewards)

Colgate Optic White toothbrush $3.49
-(1) $3/1 colgate optic white toothbrush RA printable
-(1) $0.75/1 Colgate toothbrush (SS 1/1/12)
FREE + $0.28 overage (* $3.49 counted toward resolution reward)

Gallon Milk $2.60

Nissin cup noodles$0.99

Use $12.49 SCR from November 2011 purchases

TOTAL OOP $0.85




Overall totals for trip are -
$10.85 OOP for $62.82 worth of merchandise
savings of $51.97 or 82%!!

Plus I have $14.00 in ECB's, RR's, and UPR's for next week

Thanks, Living Rich with Coupons, For the Mommas, and Freebies2Deals!

God's got the Steering Wheel now.

I know I said I wouldn't do it. But I did.
J spent a week in the ICU on IV antibiotics. At one point even with the strongest, most potent antibiotics there are, his white blood cell count continued to rise. Which makes you think the infection will win out. Scary.
So, when he got out of the hospital, I said he could come for a visit. Just a VISIT. With the understanding that he would keep his appointment with the counselor who was working on again finding him a treatment facility. The counselor got him an appointment at the center here in my town and he did keep his appointment. They are looking at a facility for a time period of 9-12 months. Unfortunately I don't feel confident that this will be the time it works for him either. Considering he has vocalized that he views it as a punishment. I'm pretty sure in my heart of hearts that he is going to have to begin to view this as an opportunity, not a punishment. Without that shift, success will remain out of reach.
It's been OK with him in the house. He's not doing anything at this point. We are so distant though that sometimes I don't even know what to say. I feel like the time of our marriage when we were the best of friends is way behind us now. Gone. Dead. Kind of like roadkill on the side of the highway left to just be pecked away by the vultures flying around.

He was supposed to have his 2nd appointment this afternoon - to discuss the plan going forward and where they might potentially find for him to go. But he didn't make it to that appointment. He ended up back in the hospital - ICU again - due to his blood sugar being out of control and his white blood cell count rising again.

I hate having to explain to my children why their Dad was at the house for a visit and why he has to stay at the doctor's until the doctor says it's OK for him to leave. They don't understand illness.

I asked God to help me make the right decision about whether to let him come for a visit. I truly felt that it was the right thing to do. Now I'm beginning to question my decision. What if it wasn't the best thing? What if he stalls and drags his feet on treatment decisions and is in and out of the hospital. What if the kids begin to think Daddy is living with us again??
Ya know, I hear so much about big issues in life, that you should "Let go and let God." But how? How is that even possible? How am I to know what the right thing to do is? Not like there is a big sign with writing on it up in the sky or God speaking to me through a megaphone or any other way. I search for any kind of sign telling me what to do but I never feel like I'm getting a clear one. And what if God steers me wrong? What if he's not even really listening to me?

Our Projects

10 - making sugar cookie cutouts to give to our daycare provider and neighbors. Close enough - we made cookies, just pre-packaged ones. (and ate them all ourselves)

9 - snowman paper plate crafts
8 - Christmas tree desserts out of ice cream cones and cookies
7 - finishing our Christmas Moose crafts for family gifts
6 - make handprint wreath Got haircuts and out to dinner instead
5 - making chocolate bark
4 - edible snowflakes
3 - decorating our Christmas stockings
2 - walking through our neighborhood looking at decorations MUCH TOO COLD
1 - making chex mix for Santa's snack - he doesn't have a sweet tooth this year.

Not bad if I do say so myself.

January Meal Plan

1 – French toast PB & J’s


2 – Chicken Stuffing bake

3 – pierogies

4 – fish sticks, noodles

5 – spaghetti & meatballs

6 – baked potato soup, sammies

7 – sausage stroganoff

8 – roast chicken

9 – breakfast biscuit bowls

10 – takeout

11 – spaghetti and meatballs

12 – sloppy joe sliders

13 – chicken spaghetti bake (taste of home) 

14 – crescent dogs

15 – fish, noodles

16 – spaghetti & meatballs

17 – chicken nuggets tacos

18 – pizza

19 – beef lo mein

20 – leftovers

21 – soup and sammies

22 – leftovers

23 – pizza

24 – ham and noodle dinner (taste of home)

25 – spaghetti & meatballs

26 – pierogies

27 – baked potato soup and sammies

28 – fish, noodles

29 – takeout

30 – frittata, smoothies

31 - spaghetti & meatballs

Some Serious Stuff

Well, after many days and nights arguing with J about why I didn't think it was a good idea for him to come to our home for a holiday visit (family asked him to leave for questionable behavior, not following counselors recommendations, fear of what might be brewing in him again) I don't think it's going to matter anyhow.
3 days away from Christmas and J is in the hospital - neurological ICU - being given testing to figure out what is causing his strange symptoms of fever, high white blood cell count,not making sense when talking and confusion to the point of not really knowing where he is, or remembering how he got there.
Yesterday afternoon they tested him for meningitis. I think they are also testing for encephalitis.
Serious stuff - even more so for someone with diabetes that is not well controlled.

As much as I can be angry with him for the problems, this is frightening me.

*Updated to add - not menengitis or encephalitis. Diagnosis is double pneumonia. Still serious in someone with their spleen removed and diabetic.

Merry Chrismoose

We finished our moose crafts that we are giving to some family for Christmas gifts. I think they came out pretty cute too! You'll notice the feet prints are not made of painted feet like the hands. The boys decided that they were NOT putting their feet into the paint. So, we comprimised and we traced our feet out of felt.

We may be crossing one item off our ten projects list tonight. I've finally convinced my children to get professional haircuts - this evening! I did have to bribe them with the promise of going out for dinner for pizza and ice cream but hey, you do what you gotta do, right?

So, I'm guessing we won't have time for a project tonight.

Edible Snowflakes

We made these last night. They were super-easy. Kids had fun watching me transform a tortilla into a snowflake. They also loved the sugar on top and licked it off and asked for more at least 3 or 4 times each. My carpet looks like it snowed in the house from all the sugar falling off the snowflakes. Good thing vacuuming is on the agenda today.

C is for Cookie

I know, I said we'd do sugar cookie cutouts, decorated, and given out to neighbors and daycare provider. Maybe that one was a little stretch.
We did make Christmas looking chocolate chip cookies (from a package) and ate them with hot cocoa with mini marshmallows in it. Yum!

That's the best I could do on this one.

Decorating Stockings

This was the next project in our Christmas lineup. The boys were a bit more excited about this one than the candy making, go figure.

Anyhow, I think they came out pretty cute, and I love their artistic differences. I think we've come up with a new annual tradition - a different stocking each year. How fun!

Peppermint Bark

Our first project in my 10 nights 'til Christmas line-up was making candy last night. I chose the peppermint bark because it seemed easy.

Only three ingredients.

Plus this, of course, for Mommy's sanity.

Kiddos loved smashing the candy canes! Alex didn't quite get why you need to use the bottom of the bowl for smashing.

And, licking the bowl out was, of course, the best part!

The finished product. Went a little bit crazy with the peppermint but today after sitting in the fridge all night, it looked wonderful! And we brought some to share at daycare.

...and kept a bunch home for ourselves.

Insecurity, Failure, and Thankfulness

I try to remember all year long that I need to be more thankful for what I have. Sometimes, at least it appears to myself, I tend to be a complainer. Sometimes the need to voice my complaints comes from my feelings of failure and the need to put it out there and hear, whether from the rational voice in my head, or from others who might comment, that I really am not a failure at things, that I really am trying and doing my best. 

My furnace is still working albeit at only 60% efficiency according to the recent energy audit I had done on the house - so I'm thankful for that. Thanks, Money Saving Mom!

It's OK to feel like I'm going to pull my hair out while the boys are running circles around me and I can't talk loud enough for them to even hear me so I have to start literally screaming just to be heard. I have to say having infertility=parenting guilt (topic for another post). But infertility also equals the ability to remember that somebody wants what I have.

It's OK to feel angry and hurt by the problems that are my marriage right now. I probably did not do much to cause them although I feel differently.

It's OK to feel angry with J when I am taking out the trash, cooking dinner, cleaning the dishes, giving the boys a bath, breaking up the kids arguments, cleaning up the toys at night, and trying to get two stalling three year olds to go to sleep. Anger is not always a wasted emotion. Sometimes it helps me power through.

It's OK to pare down the gift buying because I am a single income household.

It's OK if the laundry piles up in the laundry room.

Even though I do complain, a lot, I am truly thankful for what I have. It may not be perfect but at the end of each day, when I'm finally able to sit down (with glass, or bottle, of wine in hand) I do feel a sense of joy.

My life may be full of hurdles, and I may not be able to jump over them, but I can walk around them.

On the 1st Day of Christmas

OK, I know that the real 12 days of Christmas start on December 25th. And I know there should be 12 and we're now a few days short. But, no one is perfect.
The countdown is on - 10 more nights until Christmas!
I bought the boys Advent calendars so everyday as soon as we get home from work/daycare they are ripping off their coats, hats, and mittens to get at the piece of candy. You would think that the tiny piece of chocolate held some magical powers for three year old boys!
I have really nice memories of Christmas from my childhood. One memory I have is decorating the house and tree with my Mom, and I still have some of those same decorations on my own tree now. It's humorous to try to explain to a three year old how old that ornament really is.
So, to try to give Alex and Landon some of those same decorating kind of memories here's my plan for the next ten nights. Keep in mind I am on vacation after tomorrow so that could be where my overachieving ideas are coming from.

10 - making sugar cookie cutouts to give to our daycare provider and neighbors.
9 - snowman paper plate crafts
8 - Christmas tree desserts out of ice cream cones and cookies
7 - finishing our Christmas Moose crafts for family gifts
6 - make handprint wreath
5 - making chocolate bark
4 - edible snowflakes
3 - decorating our Christmas stockings
2 - walking through our neighborhood looking at decorations
1 - making chex mix for Santa's snack - he doesn't have a sweet tooth this year.

911, What's Your Emergency?

Parenthood.com has a t-shirt for sale the says "Parenthood means having 911 on speed dial." I am thinking about buying it for myself. Between having two boys, who seem to get injured more often (although that may be a myth because I'm a girl and only had sisters so no real experience growing up in a household with boys) and my own weird hypochondriac nature, I feel like having 911 on speed dial is in my foreseeable future.
This morning, while getting dressed, the boys were running between their room and the bathroom. I heard the water running and them chatting about brushing their teeth - but thought no way they could actually do it themselves (without me supervising AND opening the toothpaste tube.)
Next thing I know, Alex is standing behind me drinking the toothpaste out of the tube. WHAT?!?! I grabbed it from him and of course it says if swallowed to call poison control. I immediately began thinking my child was in grave danger. I asked him, repeatedly how much he drank. He said he didn't know, he said a lot, he said a little, he said up to 6. Again, WHAT?!?!
I said I was going to have to call the doctor. He's crying, Landon's crying, they are saying they don't want to go to the doctor's. I actually called my friend, who is a mom of two grown children (so she survived as did they) and asked her opinion. After a few minutes on the phone we concluded that since the tube was still rather full, and he didn't have it all over the place, it was probably safe to just give him lots of water to drink and watch him. The alternative being going to the ER, inducing vomiting, and having a child who for the rest of his life will refuse to brush his teeth.

I did however, tell them that it was the doctor on the phone, and that he said they should NEVER do that again. They bought my story. They escaped injury this time. And, hopefully, there was a lesson learned about drinking Crest. Plus I'm sure Alex had fresh breath for the entire day.

Two in the Bed and the Little One Said

I was getting ready for work this morning and it was time for the boys to start getting dressed. Alex was in my bed (as he often is at 7:00am) and Landon was still in his bed. I went into the kids' room, with Alex following. I asked them both to pick out a shirt to wear for the day. Alex proceeded to climb into Landon's bed, get under the covers and snuggle with his brother. And they both told me how tired they were - and could they sleep for just 11 more minutes?

cutest.thing.ever